Why Men Cheat

Just food for thought. Think about it and let’s hear your thoughts on this.

If you are a guy reading this, please do continue and let me know in the comments if this theory is right or wrong. I was listening to an interview and found it very interesting. The guy that was being interviewed was Dr. Mwaka and he had interesting answers to the topic pertaining to why men cheat, how men are made, and what it means when a man cheats and if they can stay true to one woman.

How Men Are Wired

So Dr. Mwaka goes on and explains in his interview how men are wired. Men react and are drawn in by what they see while women react and are drawn in by words. He goes on to explain the making of a man and that men were made to always desire what they see. It is a primal instinct and were made to be chasing after different women. They see, they get curious and they go for it.

The interesting part is that a woman has 90 days where he has the attention of a man and after that time, he gets used to you and sees you like just any other woman. But he also says that within the 90 days, women should do something that even if he goes out there looking for it, he will never find

Dr. Mwaka says men never know what they are looking for. He gives the example of a man trapped in a house without a key. What the man will do is just look around the house to find something that is sharp and will fit to pick and unlock the door. So if you happen to be a fit then guess he has found what he had no idea he was looking for but if you are not, he throws you aside and continues looking.

So you are there thinking if you are in a relationship that your man will cheat because that’s how they are wired and that every man cheats. Well according to Dr. Mwaka, there’s no man yet who has been born that cannot cheat. So the question is, can men stop cheating or can you find a man who has chosen to be loyal to one woman and not cheat?

Can A Man Stop Cheating; Can A Man Not Cheat?

The answer is obviously yes. Yes, there are men out there that stay loyal to one woman and men that don’t cheat but it’s sad to say they are very few. You might ask yourself what is it that men who don’t cheat have that the others don’t. I never understood that either till when I listened to the interview.

When men cheat, it is out of their own stupidity and selfish reason and has nothing to do with the woman. It has nothing to do with the woman not being enough for him and all other excuses. What men want is the pleasure which any woman can provide so the woman not being enough shouldn’t be an excuse, Dr. Mwaka says. So if you are a woman reading this, if your guy cheats it has nothing to do with you and you should never blame yourself. Well not unless you did something really bad that drove him in that direction but still, a man who respects you would not.

So basically when a man cheats, he is the problem. Don’t hang me for saying that men, one of your own said that. He goes on and says, when a woman cheats, then the man is the problem and should ask himself what he did wrong. As much as that is true because women tend to be emotionally attached and loyal, I guess someone will argue that there are some cases where it is different, which is true.

That being said, men are equipped with tools to help them not cheat or desire what isn’t theirs. So if they want they can prevent themselves not to cheat. Dr. Mwaka says a man staying true to one woman and cheating is sacrificing himself for the woman. And for a man to do that, he must have found something that he knows he will never find if he begins to look for it out there and so he sacrifices to keep that. You never know what you have until you lose it, and I guess that is a risk they don’t want to take.

Well after reading all that, I don’t know what you think but I sure still did have a lot of questions by the end of the interview. Let me know what are your thoughts on this topic and drop a comment. This is a topic that I feel will always be debatable with people having different opinions always.

Just Food For Thought.

By Rackim.

Someone saw to it that he wrote a retaliation or let’s say a slap back for this article. Title, Are Men Really Awful?

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  1. I totally agree with the statement that men won’t cheat if they can find that “something” in the relationships they already have. So it is mutual understanding. If not and still if they don’t cheat then men are doing a great sacrifice for their partners.

  2. Hmmm…interesting! Did the doctor mention why do women cheat? I think both men and women cheat for all sorts of reasons. I don’t think one gender is more prone to cheat than the other. Thankfully, I’ve been married for 18 years. Marriage has its ups and downs – no marriage is perfect, you got to work for it if you want it to last. Thanks for a very thought-provoking article.

    1. Well, he explained a little bit about why women cheat but say due to the make of a man, they are more susceptible and temptation and cheating. On the women part, he says most of the time a woman will cheat if she is driven to it let’s say by the man. He says if a woman cheats then the guy is the problem. He did do something wrong or he is not doing something right.

  3. I totally support the arguments from the interview. Well, those who cheat do so out of selfish ambitions. It all starts from the mind, and if a man cheats, then he had it all planned

  4. Thank you so much for this relevant and inciteful post, Rackim! As a single woman, I feel that men and women both have the potential to cheat for similar reasons: they do not not feel loved, cherished, and appreciated at home, they have not let go of past relationships/flames (are not ready be in a committed relationship yet), they don’t know what they want, their egos and curiosity get the better of them (it’s them, not you), etc. All in all, we all have the potential to be faithful, monogamous creatures, but we must want it for ourselves. We must understand God’s plan for our lives (to be faithful to one another and not “play the field”), understand our own worth (we deserve an exclusive relationship), understand one another’s worth (that other person deserves an exclusive relationship), and pray and seek God’s guidance to be the best (and most faithful) versions of ourselves possible. This article is definitely food for thought. Great read! God bless you!

    1. Yes, it is food for thought and I wanted to provoke a debate about this topic. Generally in my opinion even if you feel unloved and insecure, you shouldn’t cheat on your partner. There’s something called respect and if you do respect him/her then you wouldn’t. I think it’s just sitting and talking about it and if you want out, talk to your partner so it ends peacefully even if it’s painful it won’t be as painful as betrayal and someone cheating on you.

  5. Such a nice article. It’s true that most men cheat, but there are a few of them out there who are loyal to their women. Yes, they do exist, cheating is a choice.

    1. Yes, faithful men exist. Cheating is a choice to both genders I agree. Men tend to be on the larger part of this statically lol. In your opinion, why do you think women cheat?

  6. Very interesting! Although there is nothing “funny” about cheating, I have to admit that I got a little chuckle out of the thought that if a man cheats it’s his fault and if a woman cheats it’s also his fault. Seriously though, I believe that once you actually find “the one” cheating should not be an issue because in truth, you would lay down your life for that person and would never do anything to hurt them.

    1. Lol, that part sure is kinda funny. I laughed when I heard in the interview. But for the male gender, it is confusing. One of my friends who read this inboxed me furious about why it’s the mans’ fault too if the woman cheats. His reaction was funny. But yeah I wanted to provoke this topic and debate to everyone. He actually wrote an article in response to this that one and I will post it soon lol.

  7. Well I believe everything is a choice. Both men and women cheat. You have to make a choice between remaining faithful and cheating. Weak partners would easily cheat. Relationship is about commitment. You have to be really strong to resist the urge of cheating because everyday you’re going to be tempted to cheat.

    1. That is true. If you are committed then you will choose not to betray your partner. Well if both parties are committed, it’s easier to stay strong together.

  8. Sometimes women are the cause of men cheating, so a man opts to find peace in another place where he finds peace. And also as One Swahili Phrase Says “Adamu aliumbwa na Hawa, Hakuumbwa na Huyu”… Food for thought

  9. Interesting thoughts there. I tend to look at it from this perspective, naturally, men are breeders and being an African, if you study a lot of African cultures, a man was allowed to have many wives or marriage partners. Even though cultures have evolved, the nature of men hasn’t. So finding a man being faithful to one woman is a sacrifice on his end, though its definitely possible. On women, I think a woman loves sharing herself with a man who truly loves and cares for her and when they don’t see that man in the person they married, they may cheat, though it’s not always the case. Just my thoughts.

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